Today marks 5 years. It has been 5 years since my life took a completely different turn than I ever could have imagined. It has been 5 years since I met the little girl that would help to mold me into the mom that I am today. The little girl that wrecked the idea that Disney created with movies like Cinderella and Snow White, and showed me what it really meant to be a stepmom.

I would be lying if I said it was or is easy. For the first two years that Julia was in my life, I felt almost as if I had to compete with the life she had before. Christmas had to have more presents and weekends had to be filled with activities around the clock. I wanted her to want to spend time with me, and not just do it because she had to. I struggled with how I was supposed to introduce her, or tell people about her. After all, “step” anything has such a negative connotation to it. But as the two years progressed, we began to form a special bond and I became more and more comfortable with the role she was taking on in my life. We would get our nails done, go on donut dates, and spend hours crafting. Our mutual love for popcorn and ice cream made the perfect foundation for a beautiful friendship. I was always honest with Julia. I wanted it to be clear that I knew she had a mom, and I would never try to take her place. I would always be her Chelsie.

Three years in, Julia became a big sister. This was probably one of the scariest times for me. Julia had been an only child for 8 years. She never had to share my attention, her dad’s attention, or anything else for that matter. I worked hard to make sure that she knew my love for her would not change with the birth of her baby sister. I can remember telling her all of the time, “Always remember, I’ve loved you longest.”

Two more years and two more babies, and I couldn’t, nor would I want to, imagine my life JuJu. She is a phenomenal big sister, Jettie Ruth’s best friend, and my first little girl. I don’t hesitate to introduce her as my daughter and very rarely is the word “step” anything mentioned in our home. As far as our relationship is concerned, I’m her Chelsie and she will forever be the one that made me a mom.